Tooth Paste Tragedy

The humor of children blows me away. I knew that my Christmas Eve would be exciting due to spending it with a house full of Italians, but it was far past my expectations.
I woke up to French toast for the second day in a row, so I knew the day was going to be amazing. Then after I took a “short” nap we loaded up the car around 1pm in the pouring rain. As it was pouring down outside we avoided ocean sized puddles in the drive way, stuffed the car very strategically with two tricycles, Crème Brûlée, and Miett’s amazing meatballs. It was a great start to the day.

We took about a ten-minute drive down the gorgeous country roads, oh how I miss them, and approached Miett’s sister, Jada’s house. When we pulled up to the drive way and we had to avoid ocean sized puddles once again. It was great. I walked inside and was embraced with love, and the sound of a little girl crying. I quickly learned that Emma, who is just pushing four, decided it would be a good idea to squirt toothpaste everywhere in the bathroom. This was the moment that I learned Emma and I would be great friends the rest of the night. All I have to say is that when I was a about her age, you would say that I loved to be the center of attention. Emma is the cutest thing to walk the earth (besides a million other little kids who have stolen my heart at one point or another).

The rest of the night I was surrounded by amazing food, games, laughter, coffee, great memories, and a little girl who reminded me of myself when I was her age. I couldn’t stop thinking, “I bet I was just like that!”

Every time I walked past Emma and her sister, Elena, who is about the same age, would call my name, grab my hand and demand that I come to the basement with them to play. How could a person resist? She looked so cute with her little arm on her hip, and it wasn’t like I didn’t want to see them ride around on their new tricycles so I went. I had a blast. They were cracking me up. Telling me jokes left and right. They mostly consisted of blurting out my name, and then trying to quickly figure out what to say, but they were hilarious.

My night ended with Elena asking me if I was her cousin. She was so confused when I told her no. Then she responded with, “Well, I love you.” It made my heart melt. Once again, just as the day began with good food, it ends with good food. It also ended with Singing Christmas songs on the way home (off beat and out of tune), and my favorite movie, the Christmas Story with my great friends and my Italian family.

God's peace is addicting.

It’s pretty crazy the way that Jesus has radically changed my heart. It’s totally on the other end of the spectrum. Most of everything is different my perspectives, my motives, my study time, and my prayer time. I can feel the Holy Spirit leading me like a puppet. Even though that is the life I should have been living I wasn’t. My life from September is the not same.

One of the main reasons why my life is so different is because I’m spending way more time in the presence of God than I have in a really long time. Prayer is the huge reason why I even came here in the first place and is the one of the main reasons how God continues to push me harder.

My prayer time has significantly increased since September. Not because it’s strongly encouraged, but because it’s become an addiction for me. Philippians 4:6-7 really had a huge part in this addiction. Paul says, “Don’t fret or worry, instead pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good will come and settles you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.” When I read this I took it seriously. Why should I let anything or anyone have the center of my focus? I don’t know how I even let that happen, because God’s wholeness and peace in my heart is addicting.

Approaching Dedicated Determination

For the past few blogs my thoughts have been about Determination. That’s really what God has been putting on my heart. But I don’t think that I am totally determined like I want to be. So slowly but surely I am approaching dedicated determination.
At church on Saturday/Sunday the message was titled Blue Collar Faith. There were four main themes. They were Dedicated, Deliberate, Determined, Diligent, and Devoted. For the most part I could really grow in a lot of these areas. But as I asked myself which one I was, I chose Determination automatically.

As I thought about it more I noticed that I keep saying that I’m going to be more determined than I have been. It’s funny to me, but how do I get motivated about being determined?!

I learned that I have to be dedicated about my determination. What does that mean for me? I just need to remind myself everyday that God has given me boldness. Like Pastor Tj said, “We are so concerned about what we don’t have that we don’t se what God has given us.” God has brought me so far from where I was. And he continues to really push me harder every day. I need to focus on that. That’s how I will become dedicated to determination.

Be creative

Through out the week the students and I memorize seven scriptures a week and get tested on them every Friday. By the end of the year we will know hundreds. It’s crazy, but it’s our life. We have been in the program for two solid months plus a couple days. As of right now we probably have memorized, at one point or another, 60 to 65 scriptures.

I would have never thought that I could memorize all that I have so far. I found myself the past few weeks, except this past week, really struggling to keep all of the different scriptures in order. I keep getting the books, chapter, and verse numbers all mixed up. It felt like I couldn’t fit anything more into my brain.
This past week was different. I pushed myself further than I thought I could go. I realized that once you get to a certain point of no return. It’s reminds me running, at one point you get a second wind.

God has really been working on my heart the past few days about how I needed to give my all. I needed to really do my best for God. I wanted all of God but wasn’t willing to give him my all in return. It was selfish, and prideful. I thought I could do it all on my own.

So if any of you have any creative suggestions to memorizing scripture and keeping it all organized, let me know. I can use all of the help I can get. ☺

Get turning

With Christmas break coming up in two short weeks, I was looking at where I am spiritually. I realize that I am not where I wanted to be before Christmas break. I wanted to see a lot of things in my life that needed to change to be changed. I thought that I would have been completely turned from my old ways and mindset.

Now as I’m examining my heart I know that I have the determination to be finished with those old ways. I’m as close to God as I want to be. So If I I’m fed up with being a certain way, it’s my fault. I was really encouraged by Jeremiah 29:13-14, “When you call on me, when come and pray to me, I’ll listen. When you come looking for me, you’ll find me. Yes, when you get serious about finding me and want it more than anything else, I’ll make sure you wont be disappointed.”

God wants us to be serious about grabbing a hold of his passion, so lets do it guys. Lets grab a hold of the passion at all times, at Morning Prayer, during study time, when we clean the church, and during ministry times!

I was encouraged by Jeremiah 29:13-14 and I hope you are as well.

Delusional Conversations Due to Turkey, Love and Giving Thanks

Thanksgiving has always been a big thing with my family whether it consists of way too much food, or way to much arguing it’s always a big day. It wasn’t until this past Thanksgiving that I realized that my family didn’t see the fourth Thursday of November as big as Freddie’s family did.

It was a Thanksgiving of firsts. For the first time in my entire life I sat at the table with somewhere around 16-24 people that I was not related to. It was also my first Thanksgiving away from home.

It was so much fun. Freddie and her husband Mo invited me to stay with them over the few days that we were on break. I had a few opportunities; in between all of the moments of running around, to take a second or two to step back, absorb and relax. But in the moments of going place to place I was able to be a part of the dinner table. I was able to be a part of all the laughter from delusional conversations after eating too much turkey, love, and good memories.

I am so thankful for the willingness of Freddie, Mo, and their family of letting me be a part of the fun.