Thursday, November 26, 2009

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

God’s Timing



With Thanksgiving coming up, like everyone else, I have been thinking a lot about what I am thankful for. I was reading Colossians 3:16-17 and it says, “Sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs to God with thankful hearts. (Not just thankful words). And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father.” For me in my past I always found it easier to be thankful when things are going good, or what I thought was good, but was really just my way and my timing. I had to learn how to be thankful always because it’s not about me, and God has a greater plan for us than we could ever imagine.

I am thankful for where God has allowed me to be. I have to constantly look back in my journal at the places God has allowed me to go, and the things he has allowed me to do. As soon as I decided to follow Christ, I knew that I wanted to do nothing but speak the truth that was spoken to me to people who didn’t know it. I knew that I had this desire to reach God’s people for him. I always had all of these detailed ideas of what I was going to do after high school. They were things along the lines of being a missionary in Guatemala, or the Philippines. Or things like doing a Masters Commission program of some sort in places like Dallas, TX, Peoria, or Rockford, IL. Towards the end of this summer, which was right after high school, I realized that I had absolutely no idea what I was going to do. I found that the things I thought I would be doing I wasn’t going to do most likely, and new doors were opening up. I realized that I was focused on myself. Though that realization I was going back and forth trying to figure out if I should stay home and do ministry there, or go to Detroit.

God took over my timing and turned it into his. I found myself in office. And in that office two very influential people in my life told me what God was impressing on their hearts, and it was the impression that I should come to Detroit. Soon after that happened I was talking to on of my great friends, Kelly Schwenk, and she said, “Man, I wish that two amazing spiritual leaders would speak into my life and tell me what decision to make!” After she said that I responded with, “Yeah, I know right! That would be so awesome.” She laughed and looked at me and said, “April, you’re blind. They did!” So I listened to them. I asked God to step in! I set a date, packed my bags. I had no money, but God is the provider, and I drove with a friend to Detroit for a program called XMin Academy.

I am so thankful for the leaders that God has placed in my life. 1 Thessalonians 5:12 says, “And now, friends, we ask you to honor those leaders who work so hard for you, who have been given responsibility of urging and guiding you along in your obedience. Overwhelm them with appreciation and love!” I am thankful for God’s truth, and the way that he moves in us! God is doing amazing things in my heart. And Im also thankful for his timing and the amazing plan he has for us.

Friday, November 20, 2009

“God is not interested in our perfection, but in our direction.”



The past few Wednesdays at Total Forgiveness, God has been working in my heart so many different ways. This past week we talked about Matthew 6:9-15, “Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us today our daily bread. Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one. For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”
The Message, 1 Timothy 3:16-17, says, “Every part of Scripture is God-breathed and useful one way or another-showing us truth, exposing our rebellion, correcting our mistakes, training us to live God’s way. Through the Word we are put together and shaped up for the tasks God has for us.”

I believe that the Word of God is totally and completely true, it teaches us by exposing our sinful nature, and God delivers us through it! If I believe 1 Timothy 3:16-17, I am saying that I cannot leave any part of Gods word out. It is all meant to teach us, and bring us closer to God.

When I look at v. 14 and 15 I read, “For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”

I have been ignoring verse 15. How did I do that? I expected God to forgive me for horribly wrong things but then when it comes to me forgiving others I found myself holding a grudge against people for the small things.

Pastor Tj mentioned that, “If we are being ministers of division, we are not ministers of Jesus.” I have to live and breathe forgiveness.

God has really been working in my heart. I know that because I found it hard and impossible to forgive myself, and others around me God couldn’t forgive me. Now that I am letting go of all of that and embracing forgiveness, I have been forgiven.

“God is not interested in our perfection, but in our direction.” –Pastor Tj

2 Corinthians 5:19-21

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Sleep, Snooze and Repeat?



I will admit it, four out of seven mornings I will throw my alarm clock back up on the shelf that it sits after it goes off and sleep for another 5-10 more minutes. Most mornings it’s only a few minutes, but when I think about it, the time adds up. For the past month I have probably wasted hours.

Instead of having the snooze button in arms reach (which isn’t that far for my short arms), and staying in the glorious bed, I need to force myself to get out of the bed to turn it off. Instead of trying to get more sleep in the mornings, I am going to force myself to go to sleep earlier to get at least six or seven hours of sleep.

It’s going to take commitment. It’s going to be hard, but how do we expect to grow in the big things if we can’t do simple (that seem hard) tasks like getting out of bed?


If I make myself punctual at the beginning of my day I can see it through to the rest of my day as well. ☺ :)

I was the worlds heaviest, shortest person.


Two nights ago I was talking to my room mate, Erika. The last thing that we talked about, before falling asleep, was how I eat a million and 1 doughnuts...

I had a dream that night.

In my dream I was 5'1 and 800 pounds.

I was the worlds heaviest, shortest person. It was to the point that I couldn't get out of my house, so the fire department had to get a crane and lift me out of my house by removing the roof. (This next event is the part where you should refer to Willy Wonka.) I was so fat that I couldn't fit into any kind of vehicle so I was rolled down the one way street in front of my house.

I was so fat that I was on some sort of show like Oprah, and people started giving me money to have surgery to remove the fat from my huge body...

After the surgery I went from one extreme to the other. From 800 pounds to about 90 or so.

Lesson learned before reaching 800 pounds. I am done eating doughnuts.

Friday, November 13, 2009

procrastination, myself and I


About a million times a day literally, I find myself in the wonderful world of procrastination. Procrastination is boldly hidden in the middle of going to and from different events throughout the day, and assignments, during down time, free time and every second I realize that I am no where close to finishing the “To Do List” that I had set out to make. I am a recovering procrastinator.

Today while I was procrastinating from doing my weekly paper, I was reading How to Overcome Procrastination. One of the main topics that were absolutely huge for me was the concept of focusing on starting the task instead of getting overwhelmed by the idea of finishing it. The main idea behind all of this is that when we focus on all of the time that is going into finishing the task we get overwhelmed. It says, “Don’t focus on the finish line. Bring your focus from the future to what can be done right now.”

So when it comes to homework, a project around the house, or just your daily to do list, just focus on the beginning and work your way to the end.




Photo by: Andross

Friday, November 6, 2009

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Faith without deeds is dead.




I can’t imagine what faith without action. This morning I was reading in James and it stopped me. James 2:14-18 says, “ 14What good is it, my brothers, if a man claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save him? 15Suppose a brother or sister is without clothes and daily food. 16If one of you says to him, "Go, I wish you well; keep warm and well fed," but does nothing about his physical needs, what good is it? 17In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead. 18But someone will say, "You have faith; I have deeds." Show me your faith without deeds, and I will show you my faith by what I do.” This totally reminded me of a song by Brooke Fraser called Albertine. Her main chorus says, “Now that I have seen, I am responsible, Faith without deeds is dead. Now that I have held you in my own arms, I cannot let go till you are.”

I love verse 18, how it says I will show you my faith by what I do. Mark 11:27-33 Reveals the tension between the thinkers and the doers, those who plan and those who act. I want to have a faith that is acting, and not in a numbing routine.

I really have no idea why it took me so long to realize that you have to act on and in your faith. It’s not that hard to get. Even Einstein understood. If he understands, then we all should be able to, right? He said, “The world is a dangerous place, not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing.”
We have to step out of our routines, comfort zones, and step into the places that we don’t want to go, and into the places God wants us. We need to quit being so full of “us” or “I” and reach people, serve, and love them! Lets be like Jesus. I will have faith in action. If we don’t we have a dead faith!

It's like I'm walking in a series of different sized circles.


It seems like everywhere I turn I run into the idea of getting out of the routine. It’s everywhere, in teachings, conversations with different people, prayer, and devotions. It’s everywhere! This is a subject that Jesus has really working on my heart for a good and long while.

Routines are down right wrong, after a while you can sleep through what you’re doing because you know exactly how the story goes. I don’t want to be one of those people who are in ministry, I want to live ministry and I want to live like Jesus. The only way that’s going to happen is if I get myself out of this routine of doing things. Prayer at 9am has already started to become a routine for me. I noticed this morning when I started to do what I did yesterday, and the day before. How can I listen for God to speak if I’m focused on how I did things yesterday?

Jesus doesn’t want us to walk in circles. He wants us to be moved forward and the only way for that to happen is if we get out of the routine and let him move us.

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Associated Thinking: Foundation

Have you ever played Word Association? It’s one of those games you play on long road trips that falls under the same category as the License Plate Alphabet game. The other day I played the Word Association game with The Detroit Free Press Newspaper. I chose one word and went with it. The word I chose was in bold, Detroit. I began to think out loud on paper. Writing words with bubbles around them and lines coming to and from them. I did that for a good five or ten minutes until I couldn’t possible think of anymore without going in circles.

Detroit obviously is a place so I started thinking about places I went and people I met, the things I was involved in. Then I started thinking about transportation. Then I randomly started thinking about Illinois, and how many states other than there I had been to. At the end of this adventure I realized how much time had past between all of those events. The things on my paper had all taken place in the past four to five years. While I was still word association mood I started thinking about how meaningful those past few years have been to my life. The most important things in my life happened in that short amount of time than in my whole life aside from the obvious, birth, digesting adult food, learning to speak, writing, reading, riding a bike etc. In the past few years I have really found out who Christ was, and who I wanted to be in him. I have learned how to love others, how to serve others, and how to worship.

During the journey on paper words would run into each other and some would take me in circles. When I was writing about the different places I have been and the things we did there the phrase God’s plan sprouted. From God’s plan different words sprouted from that, which were grace, love, experiences, and Detroit. God is so amazing. I realized how fast time goes by when you’re finding a foundation in Christ.

Trust faith not facts and feelings: A personal take away.


Trust faith not facts and feelings: A personal take away.

In part one of our sermon series, Meds, Pastor Chilly mentioned this as one of his points, trust faith, not facts and feelings. We need to trust God and not the situation, not how we feel, and not what other people are saying. Philippians 4:6-7 says, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, present your request to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Man, is that good or what?!

All of that time wasted on “stress”. God wants us to pray about everything! He wants it. Normally we waste time trusting in ourselves, in others, and feelings. Absolutely nothing will give us peace but God.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009


CAUTION FLAMMABLE: EXCUSES, COMPLAINING, SELFISHNESS, FEAR, AND DOUBT
Excuses, complaining, selfishness, fear and doubt spread like wild fires. If you have ever been on a trip of some kind with more than yourself you know that once one person starts doing it, it’s like a sickness, everyone and their mother start making excuses, complaining, being selfish and surrendering to fear and doubt. That same wild fire, sickness spreads even when we are not on a trip. It happens all the time, everyday. We speak the language of excuse. We live off of complaints, and being selfish. We also tend to dwell in fear and doubt. When we start to make a habit of such things it becomes our environment, and we start to ignore everything that has to do with anything different, including the call that God has on our lives.
Last week sometime I heard one of Brian Houston’s podcast, the lead pastor at Hillsong Church. He said, “If you are in the place of excuses you will have every reason to turn back in the heat of the battle.” The heat of the battle that he is talking about is the call that God has on our lives and the path we take to reach it. We get so caught up on the ‘CAUTION FLAMMABLES’ that we loose sight. We totally miss the mark. The mark is the high calling, the dream, not drawing back into the past, seeing in Christ Jesus, understanding that there is going to be a price, and not making excuses. We have every reason in the book to miss the mark. What is it going to take for us not to miss what God has for us?!
All I know is that often times God gives us opportunities and they turn into our excuses. Brian said, “Own your heart!” Don’t give in to excuses, complaints, yourself, fear or doubt! We all have something in common, and that is the plan God has for us! Where are you standing in words of the mark?

simplicity and purpose without Jesus?


Simplicity, and purpose without Jesus?

About five years ago I was in this mindset to believe that you must go as far as you possibly can in life, and that distance is measured by how busy you are, how hard you work and how much you've have. This is still a mindset for many who are happy to buy in and do what it takes to maintain the upgradeable “happy” lifestyle. But there is a different lifestyle that I came to see. The lifestyle I’m talking about is the lifestyle of simplicity and purpose in Jesus. Thoreau caught a glimpse, but missed out on the Jesus part. He had a satisfaction with less, in the sense that less of pressure, intensity, busyness, self-determination, personal satisfaction, and spiritual fulfillment.

Thoreau believed that society caused people to wander through life aimlessly. By removing himself from the source of his aimlessness and retreating to the woods, he was able to think he had an idea of purpose. He chose to escape civilization and move to the wilderness for hunger of simplicity. He makes this very clear. He says, "I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived.”

His quote really had an effect of me. I went from thinking about the lack of Jesus in his life, and how he was a person that was searching for something different and all he needed was him, to wondering what kind of person he would have been with that foundation of God, and not trying to find a God in himself and simplicity. When I think of living deliberately I think of purpose in Jesus, the Great Commission. When I apply this quote to my life with Christ it challenges me. If you are living for Jesus you’re living deliberately, knowing the consequence with joy.